Saturday, July 13, 2013

Texas Senate Passes Abortion Bill

BREAKING NEWS, Associated Press Release: Texas legislators have forced through the most repressive abortion restrictions in the country requiring doctors to have admitting privileges at hospitals and military bases, own and operate an ambulance service, perform abortions only in surgical centers where doctors must speak fluent Spanish, be able to solve the Rubik's Cube puzzle in less than 20 seconds, diagnose and repair automobile window-motors, install door-speakers, replace residential security-systems and perform 40 hours of community service every thirty days. The law also bans all abortions within twenty minutes of conception and requires women who seek abortions to have an ultrasound posted to YouTube and Twitter.

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